HAMMER FILMS: NIGHTMARE (review)

I played the flawed Universal DVD on my iBook. Another great film from the folks at Hammer. Moody direction from Freddie Francis makes this nutter female flick a true classic. Paranoia and dread dominate this psycho flick about a hottie that has bad dreams. Uhhh... Whats new?

IS FANGORIA CRAZY?

Nine bucks for Fangoria. Actually more, its $8.99 + local sales tax. I actually ask for Fangoria as a Winter Holiday present now. I was lucky enough to get the January printing from a very generous friend. King Kong on the cover, and a review/tout of a collection of shorts on a DVD produced by Fangoria. 9 bucks for this? Puff pieces about wide rental release genre films around the December and January months. A puff piece on Eli Roth and Hostel. A whack article on Underworld: Evolution. Pretty Cool article on Creep.

Dont get me wrong. Im a lifer Fango fan. But 9 bucks? Megayacht magazines are like 6 bucks. Quality porn periodicals like Hustler are like 8 bucks. Fangoria is zombifying their own audience. I feel sorry for the broke kids, future filmmakers, and fx artists that are being price gouged by the publishers of Fangoria.

I wont pay more than 5 bucks for Fangoria. If rich friends want to buy it for me fine, I'll gladly take it and read it.

HAMMER FILMS: THE KISS OF THE VAMPIRE (DVD)

10:17 Try to play Universals Hammer Horror Series DVD on my cheap DVD player.

10:18 DVD player freezes up.

10:22 Hook up Initial 8" DVD player to TV.

10:23 Initial DVD freezes up.

10:25 Break out the 14" iBook, and the Dewars.

10:26 DVD boots to menu.

10:27 Watch KISS OF THE VAMPIRE

12:08 - Great film, shitty DVD. Once I got the film to play on the right DVD player, my iBook, THE KISS OF THE VAMPIRE was pure Hammer and I'd like more sir. Newlyweds run out of gas, end up in a castle. Dude gets his bride taken from him from a Player ina castle. Think white P-Diddy. Nobody will help the hero get his bride back. Lots of drippy paranoia and helplessness, not too much on the gore factor. Its Hammer Films. I didn't know any of the actors by name. Didnt care. Those mutton chopped scene chewers take overacting to levels all the Baldwin brothers combined cant match. Enter the Vampire hunter. ThatswhatImtalkingabout. Good ending, I wont spoil it. Bring the Hammer.

DARK DELICACIES (short story collection)

The first imprint from the Los Angeles horror boostore DARK DELICACIES is jam packed with chilling little reads from some of the biggest names in the business. Some of my favorite picks are THE REINCARNATE by RAY BRADBURY; PART OF THE GAME by F. PAUL WILSON; BLOODY MARY MORNING by JOHN FARRIS; THE PYRE AND OTHERS by DAVID J. SCHOW (who is also writing the TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE PREQUEL); and THE DIVING GIRL by RICHARD LAYMON. These shorties are the perfect time killer while waiting in line at the cell phone store or anywhere else. Pick up a book! Pick up the trade paperback DARK DELICACIES and settle down to some spine chilling short fiction.

U:E UNDERWORLD EVOLUTION

Another ambitious effort from director Len Wiseman. If you liked the 1st, you will like the 2nd. Its simple, if you ask alot of questions during a film, you probably wont like U:E. Vampires and Werewolves? Im there. U:E is the rare instance where the sequel is actually better than the original. Kate Beckinsale is awesome as a female Neo Vampirella. Only one lame sex scene stalled the action for me. Its a Vampire Classic. When is part 3 coming out? I'm there.

Damned Box set DVD's

This rant is for all the crappy studio released DVD sets that absolutely suck in quality. This time its UNIVERSALS "The Hammer Horror Series" 8 Hammer classics on 2 double sided DVDs. With Macrovision. Spit. They dont play on all my DVD players. Just like the MUMMY Collection has fits with different players. The Paramount FRIDAY THE 13th DVD COLLECTION also sucks. What is it with the collections that make these DVDs tempermental? Is it because the cheap studios cut costs, and compress too many movies, along with Macrovision , on too few disks. Im pissed. I love the Hammer Horror classics like Night Creatures, and Phantom of the Opera, but these shitty DVDs wont play in all my different DVD players. Thats piss poor.

DEMI acts her age in HALF LIGHT

The only RINGs Demi sees are the ones under her eyes! Just kidding, she looks great. HALF LIGHT is a RING ripoff, with elements also bitten from King and Lovecraft. I enjoyed the film. Its slow. I can handle that. Its in the DARK WATER/SKELETON KEY ballpark which I have been digging on lately. Long helicopter shots, moody music, a spooky lighthouse, its all good. Moore plays a rich author who loses her son, and moves to a Lovecraftian seaside town somewhere in the BK. She meets the lovechild of Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp, or did she? Half Light is a fun ghost story/thriller/caper/straight-to-dvd/B-movie that I have no problem shelling out 3.99 for.

City of the Dead (novel) by Brian Keene

I just finished Brian Keene's CITY OF THE DEAD. Cool read, then again I'm always down with the walking dead. I thought the book was action heavy, but thats aiight. There was enough gore splattered between the pages to keep me flipping them. I didn't read the 1st in the series THE RISEN, but I didn't feel like I jumped into the middle of a story either. CITY OF THE DEAD stands on its own, and like most zombies it wobbles a little here and there. I'll definately be looking for big things from Brian Keene.

Its a Hostel world out there!

Congrats to Eli Roth and the success of Hostel, knocking Narnia out like that.